You Don't Have to be Blonde to Play Me (Did that sound bad?)
Assuming that one day all of Hollywood's trees which grow the fruits of all moviemaking/scriptwriting ideas developed some kind of fungus and died? Or the cool and refreshing springs of artistic inspiration and creativity dried up and turned to dust?
Only then would writers everywhere would be desperate for stories to tell and that, my good people, is when they would finally come to me on their knees and ask--nay, beg-- if they could make a movie about my life.
Stop laughing. There's a part in this for you, too. Anyway... in this little fantasy I would have no control over the storyline. Or whether it was a comedy or drama or (*sound of wretching*) Science Fiction film. All I could decide was which actress would play the lead role.
So...here she is:
"40 Year Old Virgin", "Capote", Walking & Talking", "Lovely & Amazing", "Being John Malkovich". Catherine Keener was in all of those.
She is not blonde, true, but if I stopped the highlights for about six months, I wouldn't be either. I think she could give an accurate portrayal of who I am... strengths, insecurities and all. She's a little bit of everything...and note that I picked someone who is, in reality, only ONE DAY YOUNGER than I am. I'm not fooling anyone.
So...who would play you in the movie of your life? And if anyone out there says George Clooney? I want to meet you.
I looooove Catherine Keener. That voice. Did you see her in Into The Wild?
I'd go with Joan Allen for myself-except for the fact that she is incredibly thin and I'm, uh, not.
Posted by: Jenn @ Juggling Life | May 13, 2008 at 09:50 PM
Oh, I can totally see that. Does Mr Beaverhausen look like Dermot Mulroney?
As I confessed before on my blog, Hattie Morahan is my twin. Hattie Who, you say? The actress who played Elinor Dashwood in the remake of Sense and Sensibility. Here's a photo: http://remote.lohudblogs.com/files/2008/03/ssense_1.jpg
That's she/me is on the left. Although I've got bazooms, where Hattie has none.
Posted by: alpha.dogma | May 13, 2008 at 10:05 PM
I am a huge Catherine Keener fan. She is a sexy broad who looks real. Great choice.
I would like to be played by the character actress Margo Martindale. I love her.
Posted by: Mrs. G. | May 13, 2008 at 10:13 PM
Not too long ago somebody posted their "secret" celebrity crush. The celebrity that they had a thing for who would totally surprise everyone. Then they asked who ours was.
Mine was Catherine Keener.
I honestly have no idea who would play me in a movie.
Posted by: Jay | May 13, 2008 at 10:19 PM
damn! you took mine.
not really. she's too absolutely brilliant to play me. she suits you much better.
I could pine for someone like Lauren Graham, but I'm quite certain I'd end up with someone more like Jennifer Love Hewitt. Only, without the boobs.
Posted by: Debbie | May 13, 2008 at 10:42 PM
Hmmmm ... I'm thinking maybe Jamie Lee Curtis, but that has more to do with attitude than with looks.
Posted by: Dana | May 14, 2008 at 04:28 AM
I cannot find someone that has simular attributes, but considering my life is spiraling out of my control, I would pick Michelle Obama. As they say wish in one hand...
Posted by: Gina | May 14, 2008 at 04:46 AM
You two really do resemble.
Oh I don't know, I think a movie about your life would be as good as anything Hollywood has put out lately.
I have no idea who would play me. I'm just so -- unique.
Posted by: Antique Mommy | May 14, 2008 at 05:18 AM
Jodie Foster. Right after Silence of the Lambs came out (when she was brunette), a number of people said I looked like her. ANd I love her. She's way too intelligent for me, but then again her movie choices haven't always been stellar (what WAS that whole vigilante mess about anyway?). If she's not available I've also been told I remind people of Debra Winger.
Posted by: Janet | May 14, 2008 at 07:18 AM
I do like her, she is so REAL and approachable, isn't she? (Just like you?)
Good question today. I've been compared to Linda Hamilton in our younger days, but now? Hard to say.
Posted by: melissa | May 14, 2008 at 07:31 AM
I think Hope Davis (who is blonde and I am not) is kinda my doppleganger ... especially in American Splendor (sadly, enough).
Posted by: toyfoto | May 14, 2008 at 07:53 AM
Tina Fey. We have the same glasses and appreciation for sarcasm. I may have a teeny girl crush.
Posted by: Becca | May 14, 2008 at 08:14 AM
Apparently, Rachel McAdams.
Posted by: elise | May 14, 2008 at 09:40 AM
I had to email my wife because I can never remember my celebrity doubles. I look like Andre Agassiz but I'd prefer David Cross to play me. Also, there's this middle-aged guy whom my wife swears would be my double if I were middle-aged, heavyset and had a huge ass. I don't know who she's talking about, but I believe her.
Posted by: palinode | May 14, 2008 at 10:13 AM
Probably Megan Mulalley (I don't know how to spell that...hmm...) or more importantly, Karen from Will and Grace. I think I'm more of an affected Karen, than a real Megan, who seems to be rather quiet. But we look a bit similar and if I were trimmer we'd have similar bods.
So what was that about George Clooney?
Posted by: Candy | May 14, 2008 at 10:37 AM
OMG someone TOOK MINE! LOL
Hope Davis
She'd get the multiple contradictory aspects of me down all right, I think. Especially back in her Indie film days.
And I chose someone blonde (I'm not) and slightly older than me.
Posted by: Julie Pippert | May 14, 2008 at 12:20 PM
Okay so maybe also Joan Cusack.
Yeah, Joan Cusack would do a creditable job, too, based on her characters. I don't know her for real.
But her brother...he can star in my show anytime.
Posted by: Julie Pippert | May 14, 2008 at 12:23 PM
Joan Cusack would be a good choice for me as well...except I think she comes off as a much nicer person than I do. Actually, so does Keener, but her ability to capture the contradictory nature of my personality would come in very hand.
Posted by: apathy lounge | May 14, 2008 at 01:05 PM
Kathy Bates.
Posted by: Prof. J. | May 15, 2008 at 08:34 AM
George Clooney...
Posted by: Helmet | May 15, 2008 at 04:35 PM
George Clooney...
Posted by: Helmet | May 15, 2008 at 04:38 PM
Naomi Watts or Jennie Garth.
Posted by: Tootsie Farklepants | May 15, 2008 at 06:41 PM
Hugh Grant. Definitely Hugh Grant.
It's "Hugh", isn't it? Mary Tyler Moore's boss...?
Posted by: Nilbo | May 15, 2008 at 08:29 PM
Oh, she's a good "match" for you. If she's not available, would you consider Virginia Madsen?
I think Jennifer Ehle could play me. Possibly also a tad younger Annette O'Toole. Maybe Gillian Anderson in a pinch.
Posted by: Jozet at Halushki | May 16, 2008 at 08:39 AM
When I was in my 20's people said I looked like Demi Moore. 20 years later, I'm not sure I like her like I used to. Keener is AWEOSME but doesn't look like me. If those of you who want Joan Cusack to play you could bring her brother to my house, I'd be eternally grateful! :)
Posted by: Little Latin Lupe Lu | May 16, 2008 at 11:57 AM